Monday, January 25, 2010


There have been a lot of frustrations with my health since my first couple posts. I'd love to say that I'm going to start this again and really get going with it, but I know myself better than that. What I will do, is let myself post when I want to post, and not put unnecessary pressure on myself - because I have enough of that already!

I really would love to put up my first post about living with bipolar disorder. However, I am focusing more on having a lighthearted night with Tony and getting some much needed smiles, laughs, snuggles, and relaxation.

So tonight I would like to give a few shout-outs in keeping with my attempts at maintaining calm.

Recently discovered, yet still not fully explored, I love this website. I've only viewed a few videos, but each one has brought me to tears. The tears come from truly relating to what is being said, what has been felt, suffered, and overcome. The tears come from pain for those IN pain, including myself. And the tears come from the hope and possibility I see in each person as they share their story. I am so thankful that organizations are really taking the initiative to shed some light on mental illness and fight the stigma out there. It's so comforting for people like me, deep in the throws of illness itself, struggling to come out of the darkness, and see there are people out there that are not afraid of you, even when you're terrified of yourself.

I want to make a very special mention of my amazing friend Jody. I met her when I was 17, as an exchange student in Australia. I don't remember much of my exchange anymore, but I know that we became great friends, and when I returned three years later, we picked up right where we left off, and it's been the same ever since, even though I have returned to the States. She has been an amazing source of support, compassion, and unconditional love, despite being half a world away. She is one of the most beautiful, precious people I know, and I feel so lucky to be able to call her a close friend. From the time we were teenagers, she "got me," and has been reminding me to keep my heart full and open despite the struggles I encounter along life's path. I truly believe she is divine in her own way, because she has always been an angel to me. To Jody: you have always known the right things to say and the right times to say them. I thank you for being such a precious gift to me!

A new guilty pleasure of mine is exploring Molton Brown products. I started with the re-charging Black Pepper body wash and lotion. I indulged in some new face cream and eye cream and toner, and a few more scents from them. Although I have always been a diehard Aveda fan, I must admit that Molton Brown is intoxicating when I'm feeling so low and frazzled and am in desperate need of a shower and to smell good!

Glad to have had a great night reconnecting with Tony. I have missed our closeness for some time. Perhaps the two of us can work on a post together about what we've been going through. But "no seriousness" tonight. Hee!

(Jody, this post is dedicated to you… let's hope there are many more to come! Thanks babe, much love to you! xo)

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